Women Online Worldwide

Women Online Worldwide (http://www.wowwomen.com/boards/index.php)
-   Sex and Intimacy (http://www.wowwomen.com/boards/forumdisplay.php?f=51)
-   -   Question to All women (http://www.wowwomen.com/boards/showthread.php?t=1830)

gina montagu January 22nd, 2011 06:41 PM

gina
 
I have read your thread , and the responses with interest , and in my response , please understand my only concern is to help you solve your dilemma . . As 0ther repondents have already suggested , you should step outside yourself for a few moments , and conside you as a detached person , study yourself mentally . Ask yourself some questions , honestly . Could it be possible that you feel more comfortable in the company of women ?. Many , many women seek the company of their own gender , and it is possible for you to reconcile this with your obvious religous beliefs .

unknown-ml January 23rd, 2011 09:38 PM

thank you gennie45, i am never going to have sex. according to men's standards i am too ugly for a relationship. and i beleive they are right. thank you for your input.

moniker February 14th, 2011 07:01 PM

The pain can be lessened with masturbation. To my knowledge, no religion speaks against female masturbation and some religions even encourage it even if they discourage male masturbation.

From your questions, I think you are focusing too much on the pain and forgetting that this is a bond between you and your future husband...sort of like if you have a child, yes it will hurt but you aren't just doing this for the heck of it. The vagina is also stretchy. It accommodates a penis and is made to accommodate an entire other human being (a baby), so certainly it can stretch! Even with some of the pain associated with first-time sex, there still is pleasure associated with it. The biggest problem women have is not relaxing. Like you, they freak out about stuff they've heard and think that it's not okay for a woman to enjoy sex so they clam up and try to think about something else until it's all over. That is not what nature or God intended! Plus, tightening up out of fear makes it hurt...it's when you relax that all the "feel good" nerves down there really get to do their job.

unknown-ml February 17th, 2011 01:35 AM

Its not going to feel good.

unknown-ml February 20th, 2011 09:49 PM

my psycologist told me that i dont have to love myself to be loved. how do you love yourself? that is impossible. God made me facially unattractive to men.

gina montagu February 21st, 2011 10:54 PM

gina montagu
 
UNKNOWN . My heart goes out to you in your predicament. I realise that your religion is of utmost importance to you , so the following thought keeps that fully in mind , and my only objective is to be of some assistance to you . forgive me for observing that many women find the companionship of another woman can be very fulfilling . perhaps you should explore and find if any / many of your friends are of like disposition .

unknown-ml February 21st, 2011 11:28 PM

gina i am not a lesbo and i dont have any friends

Elusive Unicorn February 22nd, 2011 11:41 AM

((( unknown-ml ))) eveyone needs friends. Most in here would be more then happy to be your friend. You just have to let us. :)

unknown-ml February 22nd, 2011 12:47 PM

unicorn, why would you want to be, im a very negative person, no one wants to be around that.

petrol head May 16th, 2011 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unknown-ml (Post 58793)
Hi, this is my first time here. I am single, never married, and still a virgin, im 45. I am not in nor have i ever been in a relationship. i may some day (which i doubt), and get married which requires sex. i am not looking forward to that, in fact im dreading it. now, my question is this: what was your first time like? how did you deal with the pain? what did you think about before, during and after? since it hurt, why did you do it again?:blue: my religious beliefs are keeping me from having sex till marriage. thank you for your time.


hi in my expereance it did not the man i was with was very gentle so just went very slow and it did not hert at all
dont think all girls have pain as long as the man you are with is slow and gentle with you there should be very little if any
good luck and i know religious beliefs are good but dont let them rule your life if you like the man and it feels right then dont let them rule you and stop you .

sistergirl May 16th, 2011 08:03 PM

unknown, I am curious as to how you went from being 45 to 46 in three months (according to your older posts) or was that a typo? May I suggest you remain in therapy, because you might find a way to accept you for you and beauty is in the eye

of the beholder. What makes you think you are ugly? Have people in your life told you this, or is this how you view yourself? This I believe is very important information. You

do come across as negative and in your own mind, hopeless. But unknown, no one is hopeless if they want to change their life. Do you work, go to school or are you involved in any activities, hobbies with others? Personality I believe plays a much more important

role in how a person is perceived by another and as long as you remain negative, honestly and as you said, no one will want to be around you. Read, listen, learn from

others, and a good therapist about how to improve your life, your feelings about yourself, your attitude about intimacy. May I ask what religion you are? Perhaps it's not about

not wanting sex so much as it might be about the fear of intimacy...something to ponder and maybe discuss with your therapist. I surely wish you well.

sistergirl May 16th, 2011 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unknown-ml (Post 62122)
unicorn, why would you want to be, im a very negative person, no one wants to be around that.

I would like to ask you to list something good about you.

sistergirl May 17th, 2011 05:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sistergirl (Post 62787)
unknown,May I suggest you remain in therapy, because you might find a way to accept you for you and beauty is in the eye

of the beholder. What makes you think you are ugly? Have people in your life told you this, or is this how you view yourself? This I believe is very important information. You

do come across as negative and in your own mind, hopeless. But unknown, no one is hopeless if they want to change their life. Do you work, go to school or are you involved in any activities, hobbies with others? Personality I believe plays a much more important

role in how a person is perceived by another and as long as you remain negative, honestly and as you said, no one will want to be around you. Read, listen, learn from

others, and a good therapist about how to improve your life, your feelings about yourself, your attitude about intimacy. May I ask what religion you are? Perhaps it's not about

not wanting sex so much as it might be about the fear of intimacy...something to ponder and maybe discuss with your therapist. I surely wish you well.

:)

sistergirl May 17th, 2011 05:38 PM

oops, I realized that is is possible to go from 45 - 46 in three months (haha) so tried to edit the post and instead it duplicated...so please excuse.

Jennifer23 May 17th, 2011 09:08 PM

unknown, I'm not in your shoes, so I don't know what you're going through. I get depressed sometimes and when I do, I think of this guy, Jim. He was in his early 70's when he closed his eyes for the final time. People called him "Bent over Jimmy" because he had to walk with his back at a severe angle because of a physical condition. Yet, he was always smiling and saying hi to people. I don't think that I could do that under similar circumstances. So, I guess we have to be Bent over Jimmies sometimes. I know this probably didn't help, but maybe it gives you another perspective on things.


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 01:28 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.0
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Copyright ?1996-2008, Women Online Worldwide