Previously Married Lesbians - Page 3

redsuzieq · August 11th, 2009, 07:01 PM

I guess I have always known I am a lesbian but never wanted to come out to my mother whom I thought would be upset with me. I ended up having kids at a young age I think to prove to myself and others that I was straight. I am now married and have recently told my husband my attraction towards other women. He says that it's ok as long as I tell him when I leave and where I'm going. I am trying to find a therapist in my community but have had no luck. I'm hoping to meet other women who are going thru this situation because I feel very confused. Any advice/support is greatly appreciated

elizabethrose · July 13th, 2011, 06:57 AM

Hi there... I am new to this site but i felt compelled to respond...your story is similar to mine and many others... you are not alone...I was certain after my daughter was born that I was still postpartum and had an untreated depression....I in fact was depressed because I was mourning what i knew would be life as i knew it with my husband...you will learn as time goes on that your feeliongs are normal and how to deal witht them.. I reccommend a supportive gay friendly therapist who can give you support and assist with any feelings of guilt.... best of luck... i am three years out from coming out.. my daughter is five.. and it most certainly gets better.....

Quote:

Originally Posted by individual_ab

I have been married for three and two years ago I found out that I attracted to females. This is a very hard thing for me because I do love my husband and I attracted to him. I just had a baby and throughout my pregnancy I didn't have any sexual feelings for my husband and i know that happens some time. My baby is now almost 5 months but I still don't have any desire to have sex with him. Months could if I wanted to and I wouldn't miss sex with him. I am gay I am sure I always thought of myself if anything a bi-sexual but gay? I don't know please help sought this out.

elizabethrose · July 13th, 2011, 07:08 AM

Finding a gay friendly therpaist is primary at this time if you are going to pursue this road...it is unfair that many of us have felt frightened enough to suppress these natural feelings for many ..decades....it can be daunting...however if same sex attraction and connection were widely accepted ...there would be little reason to marry or partner with the incorrect sex...auhenticity is freedom...

Quote:

Originally Posted by redsuzieq

I guess I have always known I am a lesbian but never wanted to come out to my mother whom I thought would be upset with me. I ended up having kids at a young age I think to prove to myself and others that I was straight. I am now married and have recently told my husband my attraction towards other women. He says that it's ok as long as I tell him when I leave and where I'm going. I am trying to find a therapist in my community but have had no luck. I'm hoping to meet other women who are going thru this situation because I feel very confused. Any advice/support is greatly appreciated

borimami · August 7th, 2012, 04:10 PM

I have been married to my husband for almost 12 years now, we have kids together. I left him 4 times and he still stayed by my side. I do love him but Im so attracted to females. I call myself a secret Lesbian. The sex between him and I is not there anymore. But i do love him he is my soulmate. My mind wanders at night. I dream of a girl I use to see and I cant stop feeling this way for girl. Is anyone in this same position? or has anyone felt like this? am i crazy?

borimami · August 7th, 2012, 04:12 PM

Hi...I think it's because its so hard for them to understand us.

August 11th, 2009, 07:01 PM	#31
redsuzieq Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Mesa, AZ Posts: 7	I guess I have always known I am a lesbian but never wanted to come out to my mother whom I thought would be upset with me. I ended up having kids at a young age I think to prove to myself and others that I was straight. I am now married and have recently told my husband my attraction towards other women. He says that it's ok as long as I tell him when I leave and where I'm going. I am trying to find a therapist in my community but have had no luck. I'm hoping to meet other women who are going thru this situation because I feel very confused. Any advice/support is greatly appreciated

August 7th, 2012, 04:10 PM	#34
borimami Member Join Date: Aug 2012 Posts: 2	I have been married to my husband for almost 12 years now, we have kids together. I left him 4 times and he still stayed by my side. I do love him but Im so attracted to females. I call myself a secret Lesbian. The sex between him and I is not there anymore. But i do love him he is my soulmate. My mind wanders at night. I dream of a girl I use to see and I cant stop feeling this way for girl. Is anyone in this same position? or has anyone felt like this? am i crazy?

August 7th, 2012, 04:12 PM	#35
borimami Member Join Date: Aug 2012 Posts: 2	Hi...I think it's because its so hard for them to understand us.