The Power of Forgiveness

January 25th, 2003, 08:57 PM

When I was about 40 I began remembering being sexually abused by my father. Remembering helped explain why I’d been drawn to emotionally abusive men. I sought help through counseling. I read self-help books and was on anti-depressants for about a year yet continued to be in highly dysfunctional relationships with men.

My life changed when I met Jackie Woods and started taking classes with her. She is a gifted Spiritual Teacher who provides tools that help you change your life. One of these is the heart quality of Forgiveness.Through Jackie I learned that forgiveness has nothing to do with another person and everything to do with me. It wasn't about forgiving my father for what he'd done to me. Forgiveness is about seeing the patterns of feeling needy, feeling like a victim, and feeling powerless then acknowledging my Spirit and who I really am. I know now that I co-created the situation with my father so that I could grow beyond it and express Compassion.

I am now in a healthy marriage with a heartfelt man who is also on a spiritual growth path. But this is just the beginning. Now we are both learning about synergy, community and Oneness. We are part of a spiritual community working toward Peace, toward healing ourselves so that we can help heal the planet.

I appreciate the opportunity to share my story with you. If you’d like to know more about Jackie and our spiritual community you can visit www.jackiewoods.org.

Kalli · March 25th, 2006, 08:15 PM

I hope this isn't too late for a post. Forgiveness is a tough subject. i think you've picked the right place for it though. Like most I suspect, I wrestle hammer and tongs with forgiveness every other day or so. (Maybe a vindictive nature on my part, maybe not.) It is so important your own happiness though. If you spend your thoughts on the bad stuff, that time is gone with no constructive results. If you spend your thoughts on how to recognise and/or surmount the damage-or even better on occupations that give you happiness and a sense of purpose-then your health and surroundings reflect it.
Some other helpful people are; Louise L. Hay and SARK.

Napolitana <3 · June 28th, 2008, 09:10 PM

I always believed in being forgiving but its gets harder and harder....when u notice that no one ever forgives u and ur mistakes you start getting tried of forgiving and being the "bigger person"....

Divine4me · October 9th, 2009, 04:55 PM

Forgiveness is freedom.

IRISH_EYES_99 · October 10th, 2009, 03:54 PM

Forgiveness comes from the heart. If you can forgive those who hurt you, forgive yourself as well. If the person that you forgave still has the tendency to hurt, then maybe it's time to step back. Think! If they really care about you then they wouldn't continue to hurt you.
It's hard to step away. Sometimes necessary to do so. Forgiveness is freedom I thoughly agree Divine4me,however if the person<s> continue the same pattern it is time to step away.
Forgive yourself & then step forward in your life. You'll find the flowers smell prettier, the sun shines brighter, & your heart opens up more.

Wolf_angel · October 11th, 2009, 08:35 AM

Yes I agree on what Divine4 and IRISH both said. Well thought out and stated. I am still learning everyday! Thank you!

rjsfeminist · October 11th, 2009, 12:52 PM

I agree with both of you, Irish and Wolf (and you, too, Divine...and welcome to the boards).

Irish, the old phrase "forgive and forget" is sort-of true. If the hurt (or percieved hurt) was a one-time thing or an accident, then yes, forgive and forget. But if a person still has that tendency to hurt, like you mentioned, Irish, then yes, forgive but don't forget. Back away. Most of us have one or two people (hopefully in our past) who have hurt us, asked for forgiveness, then gone on to hurt us the same way again and again and again and...After a while, it becomes obvious that that person won't change. In that case, we can forgive but never forget. That's when it's best to walk away, like Irish said. In that case, forgiveness is probably as theraputic (sp?) for us as for the forgiven.

IRISH_EYES_99 · October 12th, 2009, 05:41 PM

So true (((((((( rjs))))))), ((((( all )))))).

Wolf_angel · October 13th, 2009, 09:33 AM

Just remember what may seem to break you only makes your spirit stronger thus able to overcome.

rjsfeminist · October 13th, 2009, 05:57 PM

Right on, Wolfie.

Tammy · October 14th, 2009, 01:03 AM

I think the freedom in forgiveness comes from having the choice to forgive someone/something rather than living with the the expectation that you will forgive someone/something.

IRISH_EYES_99 · October 24th, 2009, 11:48 PM

((((((( Tammy))))), just because I can.

tjterri63 · November 10th, 2009, 08:52 PM

I love this message...yes, Divine, I agree... Forgiveness is Freedom. Especially when you can forgive yourself.

Aiden11 · March 8th, 2012, 03:57 AM

Forgiveness is a tough job because its not easy to forgive others but if you do so then it means that you are doing favor to your own life.It save you from tensions and helps you to have more concentration on your self and work.

Jennifer23 · March 8th, 2012, 04:58 PM

Well said, Aiden.

January 25th, 2003, 08:57 PM	#1
Autumn Guest Posts: n/a	The Power of Forgiveness When I was about 40 I began remembering being sexually abused by my father. Remembering helped explain why I’d been drawn to emotionally abusive men. I sought help through counseling. I read self-help books and was on anti-depressants for about a year yet continued to be in highly dysfunctional relationships with men. My life changed when I met Jackie Woods and started taking classes with her. She is a gifted Spiritual Teacher who provides tools that help you change your life. One of these is the heart quality of Forgiveness.Through Jackie I learned that forgiveness has nothing to do with another person and everything to do with me. It wasn't about forgiving my father for what he'd done to me. Forgiveness is about seeing the patterns of feeling needy, feeling like a victim, and feeling powerless then acknowledging my Spirit and who I really am. I know now that I co-created the situation with my father so that I could grow beyond it and express Compassion. I am now in a healthy marriage with a heartfelt man who is also on a spiritual growth path. But this is just the beginning. Now we are both learning about synergy, community and Oneness. We are part of a spiritual community working toward Peace, toward healing ourselves so that we can help heal the planet. I appreciate the opportunity to share my story with you. If you’d like to know more about Jackie and our spiritual community you can visit www.jackiewoods.org.

March 25th, 2006, 08:15 PM	#2
Kalli Registered User Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: VA Posts: 5	important stuff I hope this isn't too late for a post. Forgiveness is a tough subject. i think you've picked the right place for it though. Like most I suspect, I wrestle hammer and tongs with forgiveness every other day or so. (Maybe a vindictive nature on my part, maybe not.) It is so important your own happiness though. If you spend your thoughts on the bad stuff, that time is gone with no constructive results. If you spend your thoughts on how to recognise and/or surmount the damage-or even better on occupations that give you happiness and a sense of purpose-then your health and surroundings reflect it. Some other helpful people are; Louise L. Hay and SARK.

October 10th, 2009, 03:54 PM	#5
IRISH_EYES_99 Member Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: in the state of confusion :) Posts: 3,524	Forgiveness comes from the heart. If you can forgive those who hurt you, forgive yourself as well. If the person that you forgave still has the tendency to hurt, then maybe it's time to step back. Think! If they really care about you then they wouldn't continue to hurt you. It's hard to step away. Sometimes necessary to do so. Forgiveness is freedom I thoughly agree Divine4me,however if the person<s> continue the same pattern it is time to step away. Forgive yourself & then step forward in your life. You'll find the flowers smell prettier, the sun shines brighter, & your heart opens up more. __________________ Smiles are contagious. It's ok to pass them on. *

October 11th, 2009, 08:35 AM	#6
Wolf_angel A survivor of chaos Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Where my heart is Posts: 3,147	Yes I agree on what Divine4 and IRISH both said. Well thought out and stated. I am still learning everyday! Thank you! __________________ May you walk in the shadow of the Great Spirit~To help others is a special gift we can either give or take~The more you give the more you receive~

October 12th, 2009, 05:41 PM	#8
IRISH_EYES_99 Member Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: in the state of confusion :) Posts: 3,524	So true (((((((( rjs))))))), ((((( all )))))). __________________ Smiles are contagious. It's ok to pass them on. *

June 28th, 2008, 09:10 PM	#3
Napolitana <3 Registered User Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: NEW JERSEY! Posts: 81	I always believed in being forgiving but its gets harder and harder....when u notice that no one ever forgives u and ur mistakes you start getting tried of forgiving and being the "bigger person"....

October 9th, 2009, 04:55 PM	#4
Divine4me Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 13	Forgiveness is freedom.

October 11th, 2009, 12:52 PM	#7
rjsfeminist Member Join Date: May 2001 Location: west central Florida Posts: 1,564	I agree with both of you, Irish and Wolf (and you, too, Divine...and welcome to the boards). Irish, the old phrase "forgive and forget" is sort-of true. If the hurt (or percieved hurt) was a one-time thing or an accident, then yes, forgive and forget. But if a person still has that tendency to hurt, like you mentioned, Irish, then yes, forgive but don't forget. Back away. Most of us have one or two people (hopefully in our past) who have hurt us, asked for forgiveness, then gone on to hurt us the same way again and again and again and...After a while, it becomes obvious that that person won't change. In that case, we can forgive but never forget. That's when it's best to walk away, like Irish said. In that case, forgiveness is probably as theraputic (sp?) for us as for the forgiven.

October 13th, 2009, 09:33 AM	#9
Wolf_angel A survivor of chaos Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Where my heart is Posts: 3,147	Just remember what may seem to break you only makes your spirit stronger thus able to overcome. __________________ May you walk in the shadow of the Great Spirit~To help others is a special gift we can either give or take~The more you give the more you receive~

October 13th, 2009, 05:57 PM	#10
rjsfeminist Member Join Date: May 2001 Location: west central Florida Posts: 1,564	Right on, Wolfie.

October 14th, 2009, 01:03 AM	#11
Tammy Member Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 143	I think the freedom in forgiveness comes from having the choice to forgive someone/something rather than living with the the expectation that you will forgive someone/something.

October 24th, 2009, 11:48 PM	#12
IRISH_EYES_99 Member Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: in the state of confusion :) Posts: 3,524	((((((( Tammy))))), just because I can. __________________ Smiles are contagious. It's ok to pass them on. *

November 10th, 2009, 08:52 PM	#13
tjterri63 Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Decatur, TX Posts: 20	I love this message...yes, Divine, I agree... Forgiveness is Freedom. Especially when you can forgive yourself.

March 8th, 2012, 03:57 AM	#14
Aiden11 Member Join Date: Mar 2012 Posts: 23	Forgiveness is a tough job because its not easy to forgive others but if you do so then it means that you are doing favor to your own life.It save you from tensions and helps you to have more concentration on your self and work.

March 8th, 2012, 04:58 PM	#15
Jennifer23 Jennifer23 Join Date: Dec 2010 Posts: 3,187	Well said, Aiden.