Squeaky Clean Jokes!

[QuietWOW]

Did you just get something in your Inbox to make you smile Well do share!

[Lou]

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?










A stick.

[ShopperWOW]

Why did the Bubble Gum cross the road??







It was stuck to the 's foot!

[Tala]

Did you hear the "Dirty" joke?
























A white horse fell in a mud puddle.

[MommaD]

Timmy was a little five year old boy whom his Mom loved very much. Being a worrier, she was concerned about him walking to school when he started Kindergarten. She walked him to school the couple of days but when he came home one day, he told his mother that he did not want her walking him to school everyday. He wanted to be like the "big boys." He protested loudly, so she had an idea of how to handle it. She asked a neighbor, Mrs. Goodnest, if she would surreptitiously follow her son to school, at a distance behind him that he would not likely notice, but close enough to keep a watch on him.

Mrs. Goodnest said that since she was up early with her toddler anyway, it would be a good way for them to get some exercise as well so she agreed.

The next school day, Mrs. Goodnest and her little girl, Marcy, set out following behind Timmy as he walked to school with another neighbor boy he knew. She did this for the whole week.

As the boys walked and chatted, kicking stones and twigs, the little friend of Timmy noticed that this same lady was following them as she seemed to do every day all week. Finally, he said to Timmy, "Have you noticed that lady following us all week? Do you know her?"

Timmy nonchalantly replied, "Yea, I know who she is."

The little friend said, "Well who is she?"

"That's just Shirley Goodnest" Timmy said.

"Shirley Goodnest? Who the heck is she and why is she following us?"

"Well," Timmy explained, "every night my Mom makes me say the 23rd Psalm with my prayers cuz she worries about me so much. And in it, the prayer Psalm says, 'Shirley Goodnest and Marcy shall follow me all the days of my life.' so I guess I'll just have to get used to it."

[Cinderellen]

Hahahahahahahahahaha

[Angel_Wolf]

Click on to this and see what would happen if you visited another roomie.......rofl
http://www.animationgrove.co.uk/cards/pc4/brat1.gif

[Cinderellen]

Cute, Wolf_Angel.

[Lou]

My mother likes Catholic jokes because she is, well, CATHOLIC! Here's her latest:

A young woman entered a convent and took a vow of silence. Mother Superior told her, "Every five years, you may say two words."

Five years passed. The young nun said, "Hard bed."

Five more years passed. The nun said, "Cold Food."

Five more years passed. The middle-aged nun said, "I quit."

Mother Superior said, "Good. All I hear from you are complaints."

[Terri]

This guy sees a sign in front of a house -- "Talking Dog for Sale."

He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the back yard.
The guy goes into the back yard and sees a mutt sitting there.


"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the mutt replies.

"So, what's your story?"

The mutt looks up and says "Well, I discovered this gift pretty young and I
wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no
time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with
spies and world leaders, cause no one figured a dog
would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies
eight years running. The jetting around really tired me out,
and I knew I wasn't getting any younger and I wanted to settle down.

So I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security work,
mostly wandering near suspicious characters and listening in.
I uncovered some incredible dealings there and was awarded a batch of
medals.

Had a wife, a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."

The guy is amazed. He goes and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

The owner says "Ten dollars."

The guy says he'll buy him but asks the owner, "This dog is amazing.
Why on earth are you selling him?"

The owner replies, "He's such a liar."

[mary]

A grasshopper walks into a bar.
The bartender looks at him a says"we have a drink named after you."
"You do?"says the grasshopper.
"yup"says the bartender.
The grasshpper gets all excited and says "You have a drink named steve?"

[BabyBoyNames]

Of course yes!!!

[rjsfeminist]

So these 2 brothers own 2 horses, 1 a piece. But they can't tell the horses apart. So they braid the mane on one horse, but the braid comes undone. So they cut the mane off. Mane grows back. They cut a small nick in one horse's ear, but the other horse gets a small nick on his ear.

So they're at wits end. They see a man walking down the road and they ask him how they can tell the horses apart. Man looks at the horses for a minute before saying, "Ya know, the black horse is definitely taller than the white one..."

[rjsfeminist]

So this Russian (an old school, hard-line Communist) named Rudolph looks out the window one day and tells his wife, "Honey, it's raining."

She looks outside and scoffs, "It's snowing."

"No, honey, it's raining."

She insists, "It's snowing!"

This goes on for a few minutes before he finally states, "Rudolph, the Red, knows rain, dear."

[IRISH_EYES_99]

lol