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Old February 21st, 2010, 08:19 PM   #16
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Originally Posted by janni2525 View Post
It depends for what reason people watch porn. If it's to enhance the sensation of being with a loved one then it's something different. I think both partners should be together while watching it. But if the person is doing it behind the other's back then it's something going on. I don't see why anyone would get turned on if it's not with their partner. Someway some how something is wrong. Communication should always be the key. Good luck.
I agree with Janni, and personally watching porn with my husband has increased our intimacy. And if there is something on the screen that I don't like then I look away and start kissing his neck or something. I find that my husband ends up more interested in me than what's on the screen. Anyway, I don't see porn as something shameful, I see it as more of a marital aid. .... but maybe that's just me.
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Old March 17th, 2010, 11:05 PM   #17
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I personally do not care for porn. Some couples say it enhances their sexual experience. I can enhance a sexual experience, because one or both parties are imagining having sex with some one ohter than the one they are with. That being said, I am always quick to tell women that it is about what they want. We have a tendency to make everything about the man in our life. It is not just about your man, it is about you also. Decide what you can live with and what you can't. If he thought he was doing the right thing, he would continue to watch the porn when you were around. I do not want to sound judgemental, but his lusting is causing him to be dishonest. He said he would stop and yet, he continues to watch it without you knowing. Could that be like cheating? You decide. Operate from your own power and don't be so attached. The object of the game in a relationship is to add to each other and that energy should flow in a way such that you both empower and inspire each other. Sounds like his energy is split between you and women that he doesn't know. If you were comfortable with this, I would say no harm, no fowl, but you're not, and you have a right to be just as satisfied as he is. I hope this helps some. You deserve the best and you can have it. Once you decide what that is.
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Old March 27th, 2010, 12:56 AM   #18
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Old March 27th, 2010, 08:33 PM   #19
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Hey, I'm new to this. lol I was joking with my boyfriend the other day saying I watch porn, and he said we could watch it together some time if I want. Idk if I "want". Haha, what I mean to say is: I'm not entirley sure I'd be okay with my boyfriend oogling over the woman on screen. And I'm pretty sure he'd be against gay porn, lol Actually, the other day he said he'd rather watch two lesbians going at it than two guys. Which is understandable, obviously, but did he REALLY have to say that aloud? It's unnecesary, and to be frank: It's not a big turn on. But how do you SAY this without sounding like some naggy old woman?
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Old June 6th, 2010, 01:59 PM   #20
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Hello, everyone. It's my first time here and was about to start a thread with the similar topic, when I found this one, which is provided with all answer I'd need. You all are awesome.
Anyway, here's a quick requet for some advice. My problem is not mainly about porn movies and stuff. To make a long story short, I recently found a folder named "Pretty/Beautiful Girls" in my boyfriend's computer. It contains more than 200 pictures of young pretty girls, downloaded from websites/blogs. It was created 2 months before our relationship started. These pictures are bothering me so much I want to ask him to delete the folder.
My question is should/could I do that?
- By "recently", I mean half an hour ago.
- The name of the folder is not in English. I translated it from my own language.
- In my country, girls in school/university uniforms are very sexy in the men's eyes. In the folder, there are many pictures of them.
- My boyfriend is 43 years old and has a 15-year-old daughter.
Thank you for reading this. I hope to hear from you. I'm glad I found WOW.
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Old July 26th, 2010, 10:49 PM   #21
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Been there!

Well, my situation is much similar. I can tell you this. Once they start, they don't quit. They say they will, ... but, they just do their looking when you're not around. Hard to live with after you marry them! There are guys out there that think porn is wrong, and are good to their ladies and don't need that stimulation from a photo online or in a magazine. I always wondered why guys need porn when they are dating or married, ... hey, they got the real deal right in front of them and yet they gotta see what else is out there. My biggest worry ... is he thinking of that chick in the photo during sex with you??? You'll never know for sure. They'll usually tell you whatever you wanna hear. Just more food for thought. Hope it helps.
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Old September 27th, 2010, 02:55 AM   #22
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I think there is no wrong in watching porn things as long as your boyfriend or husband is with you and also it is common on all boys.
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Old September 28th, 2010, 07:37 PM   #23
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Boys will be boys. I don't think there is anything wrong with people watching porn as long as they're not addicted to it.
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Old January 26th, 2011, 04:32 PM   #24
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i think him watching porn by himself is cheating. If you watch it together while you're having sex, that's actually very fun.
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Old February 14th, 2011, 08:19 PM   #25
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Ladies, we must remember that we are more sexual than men. Men need to look at a visual because their mental skills aren't as awesome.

Ask yourself, "How many times have I fantasized about a man I saw? How many times have I fantasized while I masturbated or during sex?" To me, the fantasies are just as bad as looking at porn: you are stimulating yourself with something that is not your partner. If you're honest with yourself, chances are you fantasize regularly and yet get jealous when your partner looks at porn. It's a double standard and that's unacceptable.

There shouldn't be secrets in a relationship. The fact that he's HIDING porn from you is, in my opinion, far worse than him looking at the porn. It implies that he knows you'd hate it but he does it anyway, which means he's not considering your feelings. The first thing I would do is let him know that you found his porn and ask why he felt the need to hide it from you.
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Old February 21st, 2011, 09:10 PM   #26
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I was dealing with my boyfriend and his secret porn sites and his secret porn files on his computer about 7 years ago... yup, I found it horribly disgusting and hated that "part" of him. I found it hurtful ... for him to get excited over her, and then come to me to ease his urges, if you wanna call it that. Well, life has a way of mending the hurt sometimes, and it was a way I did not see coming. He developed full blown diabetes shortly after I discovered his porno. Coincidence??? Diabetes does affect a man's labido, and a diabetic cannot take Viagara or other sexual stimulants as they could cause a heart attack. I never had to do anything to get him to quit looking; he did that on his own. He's still is in my life. I do not have to deal with it anymore. We have bonded more as companions. He was in his 30's when I met him, mid 40's now. Many times I wish we had both been born in another day and time, before internet and before free sex and porno and everything else that goes with it.
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Old February 21st, 2011, 11:25 PM   #27
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I have no experience with living with a man at all...and even though I'm celibate....I can still see that men are very sexual and very visual creatures....we don't view sex the way that they do....if for instance you look at the animals....like lions...they have a Pride....sometimes I think that men weren't made to be monogamist....that he is intended to be attracted to other women to procreate....which ensures that life goes on.......

Because if you look around it seems so hard for some of them(men) to do that....but getting back to the topic....I don't know....I guess it would depend on what he was watching....is it straight porn....or something way out in left field?.....and as other people have told me .....things change in a relationship after the newness and the joy of sex with that person has worn off..and time moves on.... then the couples start looking for other ways to keep it fresh......so I don't know really....sounds complicated....

Maybe sometimes their needs aren't being met....because sometimes, some men still have double standards about sex....they will marry the nice or presentable type of woman to have their children....but it's the fast type of woman that gets him going or that he secretly desires and can do all of the sexual things with....and then goes home to his wife...to whom which he won't and can't see him self doing any of those sex acts with.....there could be many things going on.......
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