Empowering young girls around sexual health

celebratingwomen · September 16th, 2011, 08:29 PM

Hello Everyone,

I wanted to to get your thoughts on this subject. Where is the fine line of over sexualizing (in an already over sexualized society) and giving your daughter all the information to grow into a healthy sexual woman?

I have a very mature nine year old that I have always openly discussed the technical info on names of body parts and how a baby is made. I am 36 years old and have an extremely healthy sexual relationship with my husband of 10 years. I find that amongst the women that I socialize with, most of them are not having a great sexual relationship with their partners. I absolutely don't want this for my daughter. As her mother and her teacher, I take responsibility for all aspects of her life to help her grow into the best well rounded individual.

I know that some kids are already self-stimulating at this age and I wanted to have some sort of discussion with her around this and also the emotional piece around sex. That yes, sex is how babies are made but that is not why most adults have it. (ADULTS being the key word).

So is nine too young? I'm worried that because I am so comfortable around the importance of sexual health as a woman, that I am introducing information and ideas about womanhood at too young of an age.

Would love to hear your thoughts on this and how to guide young girls into womanhood.

Wolf_angel · September 17th, 2011, 07:54 AM

As a former peer educator of sex ed in High Schools, a mother of three children I would say only give her the info and make sure its age appropriate. Remind her that her self respect is more important than some boy's need to have sex with her. All I did over the years was teach my children accordingly. Based on age and if they were boy or girl. My daughter apparently did what she wanted and now at 22 is about to have her third child. The grandson is 5 and his sister is 2 going on 3 in December after the third baby is born. So as you may see, we can teach but when they decide to do whatever they will unfortunately. But it works out eventually. I hope this helps as it was meant too. Hugs

celebratingwomen · September 19th, 2011, 05:28 PM

Hello Wolf angel. Thank you for your reply. I guess as mothers we try to give our children the best information and tools to use but you are right; ultimately they make their own choices.

Im happy for you that things did work out for your daughter and you now have three beautiful grandchildren.It is the hardest job on earth and tough not second guessing yourself all the time to make sure they you are doing the best by them.

I just find it sad that so many women are not living a fullfilled and happy sex life and also shy away from this subject with their daughters.

Wolf_angel · September 20th, 2011, 07:53 AM

Grandchild number 3 isnt here yet! LOL Due in October.

You can do whatever say whatever and etc but the thing is that child becomes their own person. Who makes those decisions regardless. All we can do is offer some thoughts tools and etc to empower these girls. Even when I was a girl scout leader I had the girls aka Ladies (which is what I called them for that is what they will be one day) come to meetings having issues with each other. I just told them this is for girl scouts and thus you are sisters in this. So leave the nonsense at the door.

I have girls/ women struggle with a happy life and their sexuality. I am for one not ashamed to tell my husband when I am not satisfied. Yet over the recent years I dont count anymore with him. Oh well tis his loss. Since years gone by we have been taught that certain things we just dont "Do" Well I believe that is why we are messed up. Then again it also has to deal with your own confidence. Mine shakes at times but who's doesnt? Yet tis my choice now and thus working on a better me. For being good didnt work LOL So just going to do better tis all we can do I believe.

/e gets off the soap box LOL
Have a great day!

LittleOrange · January 10th, 2012, 09:28 AM

Hmmm....9 might be too young. I think 11 could be the right time. But, it's only my opinion. Here's a great site about this:

http://www.healthysex.com/

I wish I knew about this site sooner.

Most children learn about sex through media, unfortunately, which is not good!

September 16th, 2011, 08:29 PM	#1
celebratingwomen Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Edmonton, Canada Posts: 11	Empowering young girls around sexual health Hello Everyone, I wanted to to get your thoughts on this subject. Where is the fine line of over sexualizing (in an already over sexualized society) and giving your daughter all the information to grow into a healthy sexual woman? I have a very mature nine year old that I have always openly discussed the technical info on names of body parts and how a baby is made. I am 36 years old and have an extremely healthy sexual relationship with my husband of 10 years. I find that amongst the women that I socialize with, most of them are not having a great sexual relationship with their partners. I absolutely don't want this for my daughter. As her mother and her teacher, I take responsibility for all aspects of her life to help her grow into the best well rounded individual. I know that some kids are already self-stimulating at this age and I wanted to have some sort of discussion with her around this and also the emotional piece around sex. That yes, sex is how babies are made but that is not why most adults have it. (ADULTS being the key word). So is nine too young? I'm worried that because I am so comfortable around the importance of sexual health as a woman, that I am introducing information and ideas about womanhood at too young of an age. Would love to hear your thoughts on this and how to guide young girls into womanhood.

September 17th, 2011, 07:54 AM	#2
Wolf_angel A survivor of chaos Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Where my heart is Posts: 3,147	As a former peer educator of sex ed in High Schools, a mother of three children I would say only give her the info and make sure its age appropriate. Remind her that her self respect is more important than some boy's need to have sex with her. All I did over the years was teach my children accordingly. Based on age and if they were boy or girl. My daughter apparently did what she wanted and now at 22 is about to have her third child. The grandson is 5 and his sister is 2 going on 3 in December after the third baby is born. So as you may see, we can teach but when they decide to do whatever they will unfortunately. But it works out eventually. I hope this helps as it was meant too. Hugs __________________ May you walk in the shadow of the Great Spirit~To help others is a special gift we can either give or take~The more you give the more you receive~

September 20th, 2011, 07:53 AM	#4
Wolf_angel A survivor of chaos Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Where my heart is Posts: 3,147	Grandchild number 3 isnt here yet! LOL Due in October. You can do whatever say whatever and etc but the thing is that child becomes their own person. Who makes those decisions regardless. All we can do is offer some thoughts tools and etc to empower these girls. Even when I was a girl scout leader I had the girls aka Ladies (which is what I called them for that is what they will be one day) come to meetings having issues with each other. I just told them this is for girl scouts and thus you are sisters in this. So leave the nonsense at the door. I have girls/ women struggle with a happy life and their sexuality. I am for one not ashamed to tell my husband when I am not satisfied. Yet over the recent years I dont count anymore with him. Oh well tis his loss. Since years gone by we have been taught that certain things we just dont "Do" Well I believe that is why we are messed up. Then again it also has to deal with your own confidence. Mine shakes at times but who's doesnt? Yet tis my choice now and thus working on a better me. For being good didnt work LOL So just going to do better tis all we can do I believe. /e gets off the soap box LOL Have a great day! __________________ May you walk in the shadow of the Great Spirit~To help others is a special gift we can either give or take~The more you give the more you receive~

September 19th, 2011, 05:28 PM	#3
celebratingwomen Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Edmonton, Canada Posts: 11	Hello Wolf angel. Thank you for your reply. I guess as mothers we try to give our children the best information and tools to use but you are right; ultimately they make their own choices. Im happy for you that things did work out for your daughter and you now have three beautiful grandchildren.It is the hardest job on earth and tough not second guessing yourself all the time to make sure they you are doing the best by them. I just find it sad that so many women are not living a fullfilled and happy sex life and also shy away from this subject with their daughters.

January 10th, 2012, 09:28 AM	#5
LittleOrange Member Join Date: Nov 2011 Posts: 27	Hmmm....9 might be too young. I think 11 could be the right time. But, it's only my opinion. Here's a great site about this: http://www.healthysex.com/ I wish I knew about this site sooner. Most children learn about sex through media, unfortunately, which is not good!