Struggling with my boyfriend of 3yrs

hopefaithlove · June 4th, 2012, 11:53 PM

I just needed a place to come vent. My boyfriend and I have been living together for the past 3 years. He works out of town for weeks at a time. I knew that we would barely see each other due to his work, but I did not anticipate how much. I can handle him being gone for long stretches at a time. The problem is that in the past year our sex life has become a disaster. He can be gone for 5 weeks come home for a week and we may only have sex one time with lack of intimacy. The latter is what really bothers me. He says it is because he is getting older and can't perform like he used to..I call b.s. He is a wonderful man and I love him dearly. By no means do I base our relationship on sex alone....thank goodness. But I have needs that aren't being met. I would never cheat on him and truly believe he is faithful to me as well. He came home this past weekend and the day he was leaving I initiated sex and was told "Don't get mad, I'm leaving in a little bit, so no. Okay? I was outraged and hurt so bad. He's coming home in a few days. I need to talk to him about this but don't know how to address it? I don't want it to turn into a fight.

supergirl · July 4th, 2012, 05:11 PM

Hellothere hopefaithlove,

First of all you need to know that you are not alone, I too sure from the same situation, we have been living together for almost seven years and he also works away a lot. Strangley like yourself it is always me that initated sex and 99% always get rejected!! I think that you need to Talk to him about the situation and explain the way that ur feeling, but do it gently, the last thing you want to do is irritate him or make him feel like he isnt good enough for you, especially if he has made refertence to it previously!!!! As for your needs, if he is not satisfying them then its really up to you to!! Maybe suggest spicing things up a bit in the sex department??

supergirl

June 4th, 2012, 11:53 PM	#1
hopefaithlove Member Join Date: Jun 2012 Posts: 3	Struggling with my boyfriend of 3yrs I just needed a place to come vent. My boyfriend and I have been living together for the past 3 years. He works out of town for weeks at a time. I knew that we would barely see each other due to his work, but I did not anticipate how much. I can handle him being gone for long stretches at a time. The problem is that in the past year our sex life has become a disaster. He can be gone for 5 weeks come home for a week and we may only have sex one time with lack of intimacy. The latter is what really bothers me. He says it is because he is getting older and can't perform like he used to..I call b.s. He is a wonderful man and I love him dearly. By no means do I base our relationship on sex alone....thank goodness. But I have needs that aren't being met. I would never cheat on him and truly believe he is faithful to me as well. He came home this past weekend and the day he was leaving I initiated sex and was told "Don't get mad, I'm leaving in a little bit, so no. Okay? I was outraged and hurt so bad. He's coming home in a few days. I need to talk to him about this but don't know how to address it? I don't want it to turn into a fight.

July 4th, 2012, 05:11 PM	#2
supergirl Member Join Date: Jul 2012 Posts: 2	Re struggling with boyfriend Hellothere hopefaithlove, First of all you need to know that you are not alone, I too sure from the same situation, we have been living together for almost seven years and he also works away a lot. Strangley like yourself it is always me that initated sex and 99% always get rejected!! I think that you need to Talk to him about the situation and explain the way that ur feeling, but do it gently, the last thing you want to do is irritate him or make him feel like he isnt good enough for you, especially if he has made refertence to it previously!!!! As for your needs, if he is not satisfying them then its really up to you to!! Maybe suggest spicing things up a bit in the sex department?? supergirl